My Experience As a Young Adult In Recovery

When I stepped into my first SA meeting I was about twenty-five years old. When I think back on what I had experienced up to then and how I was feeling at the time, I am astonished at myself today; at how the program has changed me; the extent to which it has helped me. It’s a miracle, a miracle which is still unfolding. I was less than six years old when I was visited – uninvited! – by lust.  He was a rapist, nine years older than...

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I Joined SA As a 19 Year Old Girl

My first memories are of fear, resentment and separation. Lust first came on the scene  when I was four,  my mother moved with us to a foreign country  without my father.  During my first few months in this new place I was sexually abused by kids several years older than myself.  I was terrified anybody would find out,  I was sure it was my fault and I feel guilty for enjoying the physical aspect and all attention.  We moved again  and the...

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The Root Was Lust

My name is Matteo and I’m a recovering sexaholic. Throughout my adolescence I was progessively consumed by same-sex behaviours and fantasies. I thought that the problem was being attracted to men. Acting out for 17 years shaped my whole thinking. “I was restless, irritable and discontented”. SA told me that actually the root was lust, and this was music to my ears. I began to detach from the lust one day at a time and stopped...

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Essay interviewed old-timer Art B.

Essay: Thank you for your time, Art. Could we start by asking how old you were when you joined SA and the length of your sobriety? Art: I was 44. I’m 80 now, with 35 years of sobriety. When asked how does one stay sober for 35 years, I say: “One day at a time, keep surrendering lust, and one day at a time, don’t die!” I’ve been blessed with the gift of sobriety and with longevity. Essay: How long were you struggling with the addiction and what...

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The Wonderful Tool Of Bookending – Matan C., Israel

[From Essay, December 2020] My name is Matan C and I am a recovering sexaholic from Jerusalem, Israel; I am sober joyous and free from September 30th 2016 by the grace of a loving Higher Power, the 12 Steps and Traditions, my Sponsor and Sponees, my Family, this Fellowship and a wide variety of recovery tools, one of which I would like to share with you now. When I started my way in SA, my sponsor and other long time members (both living and...

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My Most Important Possession – Bob F., USA

[From Essay, December 2020] Let’s start with some statistics. The word happy appears in the book Sexaholics Anonymous (SA) seven times, and in the book Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) 16 times. The word joyous is in the SA book eight times, and in the AA book 12 times. Freedom is used only four times in the AA book and 37 times in the SA book. That leads me to believe that freedom is more important to sexaholics than to alcoholics. That does not mean...

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Carrying The Message: What An Adventure – Jim D., USA

[From Essay, December 2020] “Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to sexaholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.” To seek spiritual progress, I must continue to work the Steps with my sponsor. I must continue reading questions, reflecting and writing answers no matter how many times I’ve done this before. This time around, I found a few Twelfth-step questions...

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Back to Basics — Harvey A.

[From Essay, December 2011] It seems like only yesterday that my old friend and sponsor Jesse L., shared with me a wonderful story. He said that there once was a world-renowned football team that had successful seasons year after year. One year, however, things were not going well for the team. They were certainly not playing their best. Their famous, well-respected coach felt it was time to intervene. During the halftime of one of their worst...

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A Program Based on Joy and Love — Harvey A.

[From Essay, June 2012] We began practicing a positive sobriety, taking the actions of love to improve our relations with others. We were learning how to give; and the measure we gave was the measure we got back. We were finding what none of the substitutes had ever supplied. We were making the real connection. We were home. (SA, 62) I have been sexually sober now for 28 years. When I first came into SA, the fear of relapsing (and of the...

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Healing through bringing the message — Harvey A.

[From Essay, June 2013] I am a low-bottom sex drunk who has been sober now for 29 years. Yet today I’m writing about a most glorious spiritual journey that I only recently made. The purpose of my journey was to bring the message of recovery and the miracle of my sobriety to fellow sexaholics throughout Europe. It’s a message of what God, the Steps, and the fellowship can bring to our lives. It is a message of how this very ill sexaholic is no...

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